Wrestling with Yourself
One of my favorite passages of Scripture is from Romans 7:
14 So the trouble is not with the law, for it is spiritual and good. The trouble is with me, for I am all too human, a slave to sin. 15 I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate. 16 But if I know that what I am doing is wrong, this shows that I agree that the law is good. 17 So I am not the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.
18 And I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. I want to do what is right, but I can’t. 19 I want to do what is good, but I don’t. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. 20 But if I do what I don’t want to do, I am not really the one doing wrong; it is sin living in me that does it.
21 I have discovered this principle of life—that when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong. 22 I love God’s law with all my heart. 23 But there is another power within me that is at war with my mind. This power makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me. 24 Oh, what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life that is dominated by sin and death? 25 Thank God! The answer is in Jesus Christ our Lord. So you see how it is: In my mind I really want to obey God’s law, but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin.
Pastor Philip's sermon on 06092024 reminded me of this passage. The pursuit of wholesome thinking is not natural. It is an internal war.
This past week, I had a real example of this. In six months, I finish my active duty orders with ARCENT. I currently don't have any idea what I will be doing militarily or vocationally. I shared the following about this recently:
Six months from today, my orders with USARCENT end. I have no idea what my next place of employment will be, nor do I know where I will be serving militarily next. All I know for sure is I won’t be on COADOS orders with ARCENT, and I won’t be serving in the NC Army National Guard. (I’ll still be in the military somewhere…just not sure where yet.)Yesterday I read how Yahweh would lead Israel through the desert. It said the cloud would move from the Tabernacle and the people would follow. I’m very familiar with that, but now I like to ask questions. What was that like for them? Did they get a warning? “(in a booming voice) IN ONE WEEK, WE’LL BE MOVING. GET PACKED!” I don’t think so. I think the glory of God would start moving, and people would get their things packed, break down the tents, and go. They lived their lives with one hand on the tent flap.I was reflecting on this today. Marilyn and I have no anxiety about what’s next. Six months will go by in a flash, but I’m not worried. I feel like a kid waiting for Christmas. I can see the presents under the tree, and I am just waiting for the moment I can open them. I KNOW God has something lined up because I can clearly see His moving me to where I am now. This isn’t an “I hope something works out” faith. It’s an “I can see it under the tree” faith. I don’t know what’s inside, but I KNOW it’s there. So here Marilyn and I stand, with one hand on the tent flap, waiting for God to move…What a great place to be!